Tuesday, May 13, 2008
The DJ on Yes 933 probably has the same chemistry as I do. On a down and gloomy day, they are playing the songs that reflects my exact feelings and sentiments. No idea if that's a good sign though; sad songs on sad days make you feel sadder, but you'll feel totally screwed if the radio's blasting loud and happy songs when you are feeling the exact opposite.
Nothing in my life is going smoothly. Having to cope with Winter's and Little Birdie's death has taken it's toll on me. I know it sounds exaggerating to feel depress over their death for so long, but I am lousy with coping with deaths.
Not to mention yesterday was Dopey's 1st death anniversary. I miss her dearly. I will be really disappointed if I don't get to meet her when I cross the rainbow bridge. I am expecting her to wait for me over there, unless she's gonna reincarnate (if it ever exist) to be someone close to me, be it my kid or my pet. When I think of death and/or heavenl, I think of Dopey. I know this may scare and put some people off, but Dopey's ashes sleeps with me, and I'm determined to bring her (ashes) wherever I go in the future.
Tonnes of problems are weighing me down, and my life is almost in an exact mess. I've no idea where to start picking up the pieces. It doesn't help when Dopey's not around to give me her utmost support; she's a miracle bunny who's able to sense my ups and downs before reacting accordingly. At times, I think of death, cause I look forward to be with Dopey. Fret not, I'm not suicidal. That's just a thought that flashed across my mind.
Dopey's death came too soon, too sudden. Till this day, I still have problem accepting it and the mere thought of her brings endless tears to my eyes. The worst thing about rearing animals is they live too shortly for us to love them enough.
I know it's selfish, but if I can choose, I will prefer to die and let people around me cope with it, than to have me crying my lungs out while still having to think logically in order to settle their after death matters.
Sighs. Time to stop dwelling in sadness. Still gotta start thinking of how to go around picking up the pieces and put my life together. There's still quite some time before I cross the rainbow bridge (if all else goes well).
I know my sequence of thoughts are pretty random, and there may be grammatical errors in my post, but I just ain't keen to read what I type. Pardon me for that.
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On hindsight, after reading xia's and peng's blog, I did the personality test. The picture I uploaded to the badge is the one and only clear picture I have taken with Dopey. My greatest regret is to not take more pictures of Dopey. Sighs.
So my dearest friends, please please please cherish your loved ones while they are still around.
Labels: Personality Tests, Reflections
I-dreamt-of-a-cavalier at 10:58 pm
wishesGALORE
1) Go for Charity Dog Run
2)
Bring the Poochies out!
3) Set up an Adoption Blog
4) Donate money to Charity
5) Convince my friends to donate/volunteer at Charity as my birthday gift
6) Volunteer
7) Go Ubin
8) A Nice Over Night at Sentosa
9) Pudding to Blend in Well
